Names, there are literally thousands of them and it's up to us as parents to choose them. Parents give their children silly hair cuts; hair grows, parents dress their kids in silly clothes; they outgrow them, but a name, we're stuck with. Even for people or children who are known by a nickname, their real names, the names their parents chose are always there popping up to bite them; passports, driving licenses, when the bank manager calls, when you say your vows. There's no escaping that name on your birth certificate, well at least not till your old enough to change it.......and that makes it a pretty big responsibility as a parent!
When I told my sister and my mum I was expecting we were in Ireland for the weekend and we discussed names at every meal, throwing suggestions out there, eagerly reading name badges on waiting staff, picking up books in gift shops and reading out loud names of authors and characters. Thinking about names for our baby personalised the little bump growing inside me and made it seem very real.
There are many reasons for choosing a name; family tradition, religious significance, believed meanings, to honor someone special or simply because you like it. And once I started to consider a name for our unborn child I realised there were just as many reasons not to choose a name. Names I liked the sound of reminded me of people from the past or the present that I didn't like, could I live with being constantly reminded of that person?? Other names I liked just weren't possible with the surname, Fred Oliver Elward is a nice name, but you wouldn't want your child to have FOE as his initials would you? And it's not just the acronym you have to consider it's how the first name 'fits' with the surname, and in all possible diminutives. Nothing wrong with Diana Rye but Di Rye isn't quite so cool, William Hill is perfectly average but Bill Hill becomes comical, an opportunity to be teased at school. And there's another thing to consider when choosing a name, how high it factors on the tease scale? You might really love the name Dick but little kids will always associate it with willys! I really like the old fashioned name Fanny, but I couldn't send a daughter of mine to school with a name that is used to refer to the vagina, talk about sending your daughter to the slaughter!
And then there's the famous person, popular character consideration, if your surname is Bond, can you call your kid James?? If you do, is it humorous, a talking point and kind of cool? Or is it an epic fail? Obviously it's impossible to predict what names may be used by a popstar, actor or politician in the future, I'm sure somewhere in the world that there are more than a few middle aged or elderly Britney Spears, definitely a few Colin Firths and more than a couple of Justin Beibers. Sharing your name with a popstar or actor probably isn't too bad, but what for the Fred and Rosemary Wests of the world? They were probably quite happy with their chosen names until about 1987! No matter how much thought and planning went into the choosing of their childrens names no parent could have predicted that one day their baby boys and girls would be sharing a name with a prolific serial killer!
And what if we do chose a well known name, does the name act as some kind of personality shaper? Are all Damians children from hell? Are all Dennis' menaces? Are all Mary's virginal and all Biancas destined to wear silver puffa jackets and have a houseful of kids by different fathers? Sounds ridiculous, I mean, what's in a name? But as parents is it a risk we'd take?
Like lots of couples having children Tristan and I aren't married so we also had to make the surname decision too, for us it was easy and something we both agreed on, Elward, Tristans surname. But I guess we could have hyphenated, Richards-Elward, or I could have suggested that we stick to my surname until we were married and then go through the process of changing it later. However, like I said the surname was easy, Elward. So one name down, how many more to go!?
I'm the proud bearer of two middle names, Lucinda and Georgina, when I was younger I actually felt sorry for people with no middle names! Tristan has one middle name and we both agreed we wanted more than just a first name and surname but I'm pretty certain it was me who pushed for two middle names, I liked having two myself and therefore assumed my unborn child would like it too! So it was decided, four names, of which the surname was confirmed, three to go!
We'd decided not to find out in advance if we were having a boy or a girl so we had to consider both options for names. My middle name, Georgina, is from my mothers side of the family (at least my mum thought she was naming me in the family tradition. When my mum finally applied for a passport she discovered that her middle name was actually Georgine, only one letter out but I was determined that if we had a baby girl she would have the right name, Georgine!) So that was one name down for a girl.
Tristan lost his father several years ago and we wanted to use his fathers name if we had a boy, so that was Gwyn, one name down for a boy. Two more required for each gender. Obviously having chosen to go with Tristans surname our baby would have an instant connection with his family, I wanted the same for my side of the family. I chose Thomas after my maternal grandfather for a boy and Jane after my mother, (also my sisters middle name) for a girl. Easy peasy, so just the first name to go, arguably the most important!
When we started to discuss names I was pleasantly suprised how many we agreed on! We both wanted something traditional and timeless. Something with character that would suit the child we imagined we would be having. Something solid and strong and something that could be shortened if our baby grew up to really hate our choice. And so it came to be that we chose Edward and Tallulah.
Tallulah; meaning leaping water. Name of the famous American actress; outspoken, outrageous and uninhibited. Shortened to Tally or Lula. It fit all of our criteria and it fitted with the surname and middle names, Tallulah Jane Georgine Elward. I love the name but it'll have to wait.
Edward; meaning wealthy guard and also my fathers name. (Not that you'd know it, he goes by John his middle name. Bit of a risk naming our son after his Grumps when his Grumps hated it so much he changed it at the age of five!!) Shortened to Ed, Eddie, Ted, Teddie. Edward Gwyn Thomas Elward; no nasty acronym with the initials, no case for childhood teasing (well none we've worked out yet!.
And so in September our little boy was born, he was Edward from day one and we registered his name two days later, we were fortunate enough that the registrar was present in the hospital when Eddie was born. As I'd had a c-section I was kept in hospital for two awful days and nights and we registered his birth just before we left to go home. I'd cared for Edward for two whole days and nights and the responsibility hadn't really hit me, however as we sat opposite the registrar a huge wave of responsibility swelled over me! After filling in the forms and signing on the dotted lines we walked out with a birth certificate and a child officially called Edward Gwyn Thomas Elward.
I never doubted our choice and I still love his name, though I do kind of miss calling him Wotsit!
Like lots of couples having children Tristan and I aren't married so we also had to make the surname decision too, for us it was easy and something we both agreed on, Elward, Tristans surname. But I guess we could have hyphenated, Richards-Elward, or I could have suggested that we stick to my surname until we were married and then go through the process of changing it later. However, like I said the surname was easy, Elward. So one name down, how many more to go!?
I'm the proud bearer of two middle names, Lucinda and Georgina, when I was younger I actually felt sorry for people with no middle names! Tristan has one middle name and we both agreed we wanted more than just a first name and surname but I'm pretty certain it was me who pushed for two middle names, I liked having two myself and therefore assumed my unborn child would like it too! So it was decided, four names, of which the surname was confirmed, three to go!
We'd decided not to find out in advance if we were having a boy or a girl so we had to consider both options for names. My middle name, Georgina, is from my mothers side of the family (at least my mum thought she was naming me in the family tradition. When my mum finally applied for a passport she discovered that her middle name was actually Georgine, only one letter out but I was determined that if we had a baby girl she would have the right name, Georgine!) So that was one name down for a girl.
Tristan lost his father several years ago and we wanted to use his fathers name if we had a boy, so that was Gwyn, one name down for a boy. Two more required for each gender. Obviously having chosen to go with Tristans surname our baby would have an instant connection with his family, I wanted the same for my side of the family. I chose Thomas after my maternal grandfather for a boy and Jane after my mother, (also my sisters middle name) for a girl. Easy peasy, so just the first name to go, arguably the most important!
When we started to discuss names I was pleasantly suprised how many we agreed on! We both wanted something traditional and timeless. Something with character that would suit the child we imagined we would be having. Something solid and strong and something that could be shortened if our baby grew up to really hate our choice. And so it came to be that we chose Edward and Tallulah.
Tallulah; meaning leaping water. Name of the famous American actress; outspoken, outrageous and uninhibited. Shortened to Tally or Lula. It fit all of our criteria and it fitted with the surname and middle names, Tallulah Jane Georgine Elward. I love the name but it'll have to wait.
Edward; meaning wealthy guard and also my fathers name. (Not that you'd know it, he goes by John his middle name. Bit of a risk naming our son after his Grumps when his Grumps hated it so much he changed it at the age of five!!) Shortened to Ed, Eddie, Ted, Teddie. Edward Gwyn Thomas Elward; no nasty acronym with the initials, no case for childhood teasing (well none we've worked out yet!.
And so in September our little boy was born, he was Edward from day one and we registered his name two days later, we were fortunate enough that the registrar was present in the hospital when Eddie was born. As I'd had a c-section I was kept in hospital for two awful days and nights and we registered his birth just before we left to go home. I'd cared for Edward for two whole days and nights and the responsibility hadn't really hit me, however as we sat opposite the registrar a huge wave of responsibility swelled over me! After filling in the forms and signing on the dotted lines we walked out with a birth certificate and a child officially called Edward Gwyn Thomas Elward.
I never doubted our choice and I still love his name, though I do kind of miss calling him Wotsit!
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